Study A Broad.

I've had many formidable influences in my life. Many of them strong, surly sweethearts. Women of a certain demeanor, coolness. Women who look you in the eye when they speak to you and require the same. Women with a hearty handshake, and a sturdy gait. I've often been taken in by the kindness of strange girls. They only seem strange becausethey aren't a traditional totem of femininity at every moment. I'm talking about Broads.

Good broads, tough broads, funny broads, serious broads. I love them all. I knew this great broad who bar tended on the CT Shoreline (Yankee Key West) She could escort a problem patron out the door, headfirst if they deemed it necessary. She could change kegs and not lose a nail or anyone of the 10 gold bracelets she brought back from St Croix where she went deep sea fishing. She wore them all at the same time. She used to teach pre school and had a license to drive a tractor trailer. She'd jumped from planes, trains and automobiles. She taught me about life experience and the School Of Hard Knocks. She gave me insights into human nature as perfect meld of father and mother sage. Married thrice, too much a man for her spouse and more woman that he counted on. She took Life by the stones,

sometimes catching it on the chin. But she got back up, dusted herself off and made a joke of the experience.

If you spend any bit of quality time with a broad you will get great information in a grand manner. Broads spit, drink dirty martini's and smoke cigars. Broads have common sense, a sense disappearing lately. Broads have experience and a great perspective on Life. Broads will even know the last Stanley Cup Champions. This doesn't mean they are any less girly than others in their gender. This means that they appreciate a great steak and a good conversation. They have two feet on the ground at most times. And sometimes on the throat of some one's that pissed them off. A good broad knows her limits and will let others know when they've reached theirs. A good broad can throw a ball, a punch and a party. And she's capable of doing all at the sa

me time. She's adroit and honest.

I believe that in much like Robin Hood's "Queen For A Day" theory Study A Broad would behove many people nowadays. Picture this, Sicily 2011, you're in a cafe in Taormina, a beautiful city high in the mountains. The place is busy. This

broad strolls in after separating from her church group's guided tour. It's not that she doesn't have a healthy respect for organized religion (they do get great group rates for international travel) but the pack of them were slowing her

down from getting the local flavor. There are no free tables but you do have

an extra seat at yours, Carpe Broadum; Seize The Broad!! With a hearty wave or even a two fingered whistle rally that sally into your pen and make nice with a broad. Study the insights that this beacon of energy has to offer. Give the broad shelter from the glare of prayer junkies and leer of merry men on her bus. Take the time to get back to basics with now pretense and a lot of great spirit. If this opportunity to Study A Broad comes your way, in whatever country, state, park or bar, do this. You'll both be awful glad you did.

One of my favorite broads of all time is Brenda Vaccaro. That gravelly voice and no nonsense

acting style made me look up to her on TV. That and I usually sat on the floor when watching tv so I had to look up to see anything, but I digress. She always owned the screen and the scene. A beautiful Italian woman from Brooklyn, she had broad DNA from the get go.

Her roles are numerous in stage, screen and television. How can anyone forget Angela Pitrillo aka Big Sally the role she played on Golden Girls? To act with that ensemble you would need serious comedy chops and talent. She's got all that. But that voice? It's phenomenal, primal. It screams Broad. I had a "To Wong Foo" moment when out for chinese one day. Any restauran

t in Los Angeles will sport the head shots of actors famous and hoping to be on their walls. I personally adorn a dry cleaner in No. Hollywood and a destroyed diner on the CT shoreline. While admiring the restaurant's collection I locked onto Ms Vaccaro's at the exact moment I heard her across the room. Yeah, there was an audible Gush. "Please, bring the soup first and some your famous noodles I love so much. Don't forget the mustard." I died. Died. I was in the presence of a great Broad. She sensed she had a fan, keeping the volume of that amazing voice at such a great level. I

was hooked. She was working a reporter doing a bio on her, she was glowing. She talked with broad strokes usi

ng names and impersonations. She is a force to be near. Her best line came as we were leaving. "I'll just get on 'Desperate Housewives' somehow, they're taking any old

cow nowadays." She locked eyes with me, that was entirely for her little fan boy here. Such spirit. She closed with the chorus line of "Come In From The Rain". My own little Broad-way review. Thanks Ms Vaccaro, and happy birthday on November 18th.

To everyone near and far; Study A Broad, education never stops and sometimes hurts. Learn something new whenever you can.