Indiana Jones and The Fountain of Youth.

Dateline: HOllYWOOD,
Subject: Script approval (finally) for the fourth installment of the Indiana Jones Franchise.
Release Date: 2008

This just in. By the power of the green, the blue, the red and the white we have been granted a new chapter in archaeology and testosterone. The next Indiana Jones Movie has been given the greenlight by the colors that be: the green-the almighty dollar, the blue-the viagra Callista dreads, the red-where the studio doesnt want to be, and the white-men in a boardroom. Think of this as a DaVinci code of sorts, another aged moviestar follows signs back to the trough of cultural appreciation, under the guise of a god complex.

Harrison Ford has been eligible for social security for the last two years. He has cars older than his lifemate. He's going to play the adventurer that amazed us all in our youth. In his. He's introduced us to his character's father, Sean Connery. If they bring that character back for a cameo in the film, this movie could end up looking like a modern day cocoon. My fertile imagination got ahead of me and I started to dream this movie up. World Wide Release on Memorial Day, just in case. Product tie-ins with Burger King and Metamucil. A gigantic resurgance of whip sales and a corresponding resurgance of whip related injuries in adult residence communities. Fedoras and bomber jackets long since forgotten in attics will be dug out again.

Fade In: the basement of a Waffle House in Daytona, FL.

Indy has found himself defending a group of mentally challenged bussers
from some ravenous realtors who want to convert the restaurant into a stripmall
replete with a Baja Fresh. While fending them off he finds that the building is
built on Ponce de Leon Blvd and the freezer that normally houses waffle batter,
is a gateway to the actual fountain of youth. Indy's gal pal reveals her true nature by trampling over little drooling Hannah to get into the freezer and claim the prize.................................. .

The casting is pretty straightforward for the gal pal, judging from this vehicle, another spotlight craving whore.

(yeah, it's gonna go like this, this year)