Shutting the botox door, and opening the collagen window.

This past Emmy Awards is a hallmark to where the vapid Entertainment profession is going; to a boring hell in a knock-off designer bag. TV Guide Channel's decision to replace Fashion Gurus The Rivers Girls with Lisa Rinna says to me that younger markets are being courted. Chumming the audience waters with a beverly hills science project more readily identified from her 'Melrose' days, may increase viewership on their pre-show telecast than Joan and Melissa. Lisa Rinna was as boring as a GE Commercial. Her self serving nature was the only thing remarkable in the show. Joan and Melissa ARE the Red Carpet. Joan herself is identified with creating the whole fashion 'wrap-up' experience and with coining the phrase, "Who are you wearing?" They are the original sillicone enhanced bastions of bitchiness. Seeing an award show without them involved was a very hollow holiday. How can we celebrate without the Court Jesters jabbing and jeering at the prancing and preening? They were pioneers in Prada and the (Bob) Mack (ee) Daddys of the pre-show celebration that we come to look for in award season.

As we are now fully into the Ball Season, stepped in European Tradition, that culminates in Mardis Gras; we echo the vitality with Award Season. The Grammys, The Golden Globes, The Oscars and so many other shows pop up between now and Easter, and the civility and glamor has been thrown out on it's kiester. Ryan Seacrest mc'ing the show is also telling of where style is being replaced with sound bytes of the self serving. Remember when there were people of talent who could Headline an award show, and not just walk it down the aisle? A slice of Bob Hope is all we're asking for, it's not alot. And then to add insult to injury, my local cable carrier didn't carry the actual airing of the show, I had to catch it in bytes on the computer. Hollywood was just over the Hill and I couldn't be entertained in my home.

"I seek Justice. I seek Satisfaction. Denied." -Gomez Addams,
Addams Family Values

Is it wrong to want my cake and to eat it too? Is it an inescapable fact that we will rapidly/vapidly replace tradition with trade-in to get where we're 'going'? Will we eventually realize that society is being left on Jenga foundation when we keep removing these cornerstones like Joan and Melissa Rivers stumble over people on the Red Carpet. I won't
apologize for wanting the Super in my Superficial.

Em, M.E., Emmy.

My friend Em used to tend bar in a roadhouse called the Highliner in Westbrook, CT. There was sawdust on the floor, trains would go by and the beer was still 2.50. On Fridays the whole town would converge on the Highliner to hear the Convertibles play popular 50's and 60's tunes. Em would navigate the bar in cut-offs and a white button down looking like a curvaceous dilletante who didn't know she'd been drugged, mugged and taken from the cotillion. Somewhere between Patty Hearst and The Mrs. Astor you'd find my beautiful friend tending bar and maintaining her ben-wa-balls. When my better-half was courting me, he brought his good friends in to spec me out, the Highliner was designated as the petri dish (funny on two levels). The good friends associate queried Em on what white wines does she serve. Em, sweat running from buzz-cut blonde tip to bossom stopped patiently and delivered, "I don't know if you've noticed sir, but you're in a gin-mill. The only white wine we serve comes out of our soda gun. How many would you like?"

An M.E. cuts into you when you are dead.

Emmys this year posthumously honor almost as many shows that are off the air as they do shows that are still running. If you trace my tangent properly you'll see that all topics reach the root of what's real/reel. And you're probably smiling, natch. Gray's Anatomy was nominated for an emmy, has had an ME, and reminds me of my friend Em. Coincidence? I think not.