Bananaland; Beach Birth, Teach Mirth.

Grandmonkeymomma gathered the monkeys three; Quentin and younger twin siblings Cosmo and Annelle for a day at the beach. Schoolhouse had let all it's students for another summer and Nana was determined not to let the children become a nuisance under a three-toe foot by deciding a trip to the beach would be a distraction to Bananaland hijinx. Several vineswings later the family found themselves toe deep in the sand. A beautiful breeze blew the seagulls overhead hither and yon. The sun shone down and Grandmonkeymomma, yawned. A nap was in order as everything else seemed to be.

"Be good little monkeys three and maybe we'll stop at the Honeygrove on our way home" Nana cajoled making her way, hand over knuckle, to the shade of the palms near the forrest.

In unison, "Yes Grandmonkeymomma," the three 'peated from the water's edge.

Annelle wrapped herself in all the towels, pretending to be a supermodel, while twin Cosmo snapped invisible photos. She hopped up on the jetty dividing the monkey's beach from the rhinos and began to strut and spin. "I work the runway like I own it. Walk. Roll. Spin. Pose." she said. Quentin warned the two to not frolic too far out on the jetty as they may fall in the water and get the towels wet. But Annelle was lost in the glamour of the moment and having to much of a monkeymoment. When she tripped on her invisible Jimmy Choos she went tail over turban into the water but not without grabbing her twin's tail who had chosen that exact moment to lookdown and reload.

"Now you've done it," cried Quentin, "We're all going to have sandybottoms because of that modelbusiness."

Cosmo grew mischevious knowing that a portly little rhinokid had hung up his towel on the jetty post while he and his siblings dove off the posts at the end. He began to skulk his way towards it. He shimmied on his belly. He became invisible behind a palm. He leaped up one branch. Then down two. Then up three. And down two. He slowly made his way to the edge of the posts when SNAP!!!! He suddenly felt an incredibly sharp pain on his bum just to the right of his tailstem. The welt that was rising brought a howl from his sandy lips, and a chuckle from his siblings. There stood Grandmonkeymomma with a wound up wet towel, waving to Mrs Rhinoplasty and her brood.

"Get over to that palmtree Cosmo and think about what you've just learned. Mischief is not a vacationland for monkeys just out of school. " Cosmo could not stop bemoaning his punishment or his new bruise as he made his way quickly to the palm. Grandmonkeymomma was very clear when she taught the tree that day;

Remember that monkeys who prowl for towel, howl.

Bananaland. Say it loud. Bananaland. Say it prowd. Bananland. Let it ring, let it sing. Bananaland.

Forget Paris, We'll Always Have Washington.

Heiress Paris Hilton was escorted home yesterday in a media frenzy weeks shy of her original jail sentence. The heiress was serving time for REPEATEDLY violating her probation terms for her DUI convictions. The irony here is that without a publicist Paris has trouble completing any kind of sentence. She made it home to show off her latest piece of jewelry, an electronic ankle monitoring device, saddened that it doesn't come in Prada. See, it's the showiness of the new rich youth that endanger the good image of a true Diva like Madame or Cher. True Diva's take it on the chin and reciprocate in spades. It's called ownership; owning up for one's mistakes as well as victories. Unfortunately for Paris Judge Sauer of the LA County Courts was not to pleased by Sherriff Lee Baca's decision to release her early. The purpose of her stern sentence was to teach her humility and this will not be circumvented by Sherriff Baca. Back to jail went Paris this afternoon in new jewelry; handcuffs.

I don't want to start Gay Pride Weekend here in Los Angeles on such a dour note, Paris was our Grand Marshall for the Pride Parade two years ago. So all of us at Spatagram wish her well and hope she does as well as Martha on the re-bound. To start Gay Pride properly, lets all cheer about the Old School Outing of Isaiah Washington! ABC has decided to let the anger riddened homophobe to go in pursuit of other projects and not pick up his contract. Thank you ABC, it's good to see you listen as well as Judge Sauer on mob climate. Good weather to all and a TREMENDOUS PRIDE for all so blessed with this life.

Earth Day tour of the house

The irony of this is if you have the cash to buy in Southern California you probably have cash to burn AS utilities. Remember that inheiratance was the original Fossil Fuel.

PS Look at my buddy O go!!!!