Rabbit, rabbit.

Hope springs eterenal and Spring eternally hopes. Can you imagine such a mild winter ending so fast? Truth inconvenienced most states for only two weeks or so. This is such a far cry from 'when we were kids'. In the closing of this season we bring luck to the month ahead with the cry of 'rabbit rabbit', that wonderful incantation first uttered on the first day of the month. And here at Spatagram, we look back on the wonders of the month prior.











February always zips by. It's like a wormhole to spring. That damn groundhog lights the match and before we know it the short month is gone. I like spring in the same way that I enjoy March, they are both nouns and verbs. Alot like pork they have various settings where they are appropriate and not. I would never march right in and spring this on you but I know that spring is in march. I used to live in a little cottage near the ocean and every year I would plant daffodils on the front lawn so they would let everyone know the snow was done. And seeing as they naturalize, or spread, every year my proclamation would get louder. Spring forth and run into this next year.











Former NBA player John Amaechi sprung the news of him being a retired gay ballplayer on the nation this past month, making him the first of the sport to do so. Amaechi, 36 has done more in his life and seen more places in the world than all of the midwest and most of the red states of the Americas. His superiority lies in his mother being british and his schooling being european. Maybe his superiority just lies in his being a very tall, published, out gay male. The purpose of the preceeding generalizations are to parallel those made by his 'colleague' Tim Hardaway in response to Amaechi's coming out.

"You know, I hate gay people, so I let it be known," Hardaway said. "I don't
like gay people and I don't like to be around gay people. I am homophobic. I
don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world or in the United States."

If ignorance is bliss then the locker room is Eden.











Financial guru and all around personality Suze Orman came out as well. Is anyone suprised? My favorite line from the internet is "...analyst and personality Suze Orman has come uot. And in her own inimitable style has announced she is a lesban." These little things in life and words make me smile. I love the fact that every month we add more faces to the community that our youth can look up to. As role models Orman and Amaechi are accomplished and they're just plain tall. (Look up to. Role model. Tall. I slay me)











On a fantastic note, comicbook supergroup The Fantastic Four return to the movie theatres in june following their lackluster debut in 05. "Fantastic Four 2: Rise Of The Silver Surfer" kicks off the summer movie blitz and this looks like it might redeem itself.



On another fantastic note, country singer Kenny Chesney spoke out on the rumors that he is gay. His ill-fated marriage to Academy Award winner Renee Zellweger ended in divorce with the actress filing to annul the marriage on the grounds of 'fraud'. Subsequently, there has been speculation to his sexuality prompting him to go the route of Clay Aiken and stand on the mountain top proclaiming his hetero es mas macho. Of course the top he chose was Anderson Cooper and CNN. Now that's funny on three levels (you know). As the sayings go, "where there's smoke there's flamer." "If it walks like a duck, and lisps like a duck, chances are...". He is one fine looking dude, we would be fortunate to have him in our fold. He'd look good in the front row of the class photo @ HQ. But his self-loathing has brought him to a recent photo shoot with a supermodel as damage control. This always lends credibility. Remember back in the day when Dan Quayle was beefing up his image with the troops and was handling that rocketlauncher? Backwards? It's the same school of thought, that a picture is worth a thousand words, I mean it worked for Ryan Seacrest with Teri Hatcher.



And speaking of shitting you, American Airlines announced today that customers in coach class will be allowed to use the restrooms in first class. Yes, you can make all kinds of 'head of the class' jokes if you wish, I'm not properly caffeinated to do all the puns for you. No word on what the mile high club has to say on this. Divide up into discussion groups and make the jokes up, prizes will be awarded for originality and color. Rabbit, rabbit.

Rabbit, rabbit.

The second of the year, and we're still here. That just smacks of optimism, don't cha think?
With the world getting colder where it's not expected and warmer everywhere else, Global Warming is the harbinger of destruction. But on a happy note, ground hogs day is around the corner.

Let's start the month with recognizing the bravery it takes to live your life, and your commercially successful life; Out. There's always been buzz around the lead singer for Indie smash hit Bloc Party's lead singer Kele Okereke. Since their debut recording of Silent Alarm the questions have circulated about the alluring young androgenous man. In January Kele let the public know, "That he likes the gents". Kudos to the man that is a gay, black young indierock aritist, now out. Maybe a role model like this will stop the hatred and violence on successful ABC primetime sets. Sweet, petite and to the meat.

Speaking of meat, dvd culture enjoys itself some easter eggs and drives fans around the disc looking for the hidden prizes. Easter eggs are bonus features usually hidden in dvd's to drive the fan's interest in the project. Sometimes they can be alternative endings, sometimes additional scences. The recent trailer of the Marvel's Fantastic Four 2; Rise Of The Silver Surfer had the digital artisits installing some easter eggs already, or are they a trick of the lighting. It would certainly seem that it would take balls to surf throught rush hour bridge and tunnel traffic and did the animators give the Surfer a set? Could they send some over to ABC, the home for homophobia? The CGI is wild on this upcoming summer blockbuster, and hopefully this time around they'll bring a script to help in making the movie.

Rabbit, rabbit. A good month to us all. A short one, but hopefully a great one. Peace, y'all.

Gracious Living, part four (th)

Certain traditions are more special than others to me. Open houses at the holidays, calling Mom on my birthday to say thanks, and especially the Fourth of July. Independence Day means more than renting a Will Smith film and frying chicken. We celebrate our freedom todo such things like this, blogging.Our independence is a great swelling of pride that makes people appreciate all things american; soccer, hotdogs and apple pie. Let's celebrate with fireworks and nice looking men. All in one.

The World Cup plays on and I can't hope that I get to see Italy level France enough. It would be right on so many levels. The whole world around is celebrating soccer and the americans are the last to arrive in the hysteria. We are bullish people who demand our language be spoken wherever we are, local systems of measurment translate into ours and that our sporting events be worshipped as if a temple. It would be ideal if our celebrity athletes treated their bodies in a similar manner, but I digress. Go Italia!!!!!!!!! Gooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!


It means watching the Nathan's sponsored Coney Island Hot Dog Eating contest and having hotdogs for dinner, cringing at each bite. The only thing worse than watching the actual event is reading the contestants prior victories and fortes. The crazy samoan who ate 35 burritos in a half and hour, the little asian girl who place second in the goldfish swallowing contest, the senior citizen who took too much exlax and blurred the line between sportsmanship and ...........depends. How in the name of Jenny Craig do people come to these competitions? Crazy is as crazy does, shirley/surley there are more entertaining things they can find to do with there time than risking renal failure. Maybe they can run through the fields of whatever backwater they hail from, singing selections from "The Sound Of Music" with a lightning rod in each hand. "Thee Hiiillls arrre a-liiiiive with thee soooound of Muuuussszzzzzzzzzzzzziiiiiiikkkkkkkkkkkkk". Cue sulphur smell.

Apple pie is part of the my most important traditions in the holiday. A long time ago in a cottage by the Sound, the heat rolled in and set oppresively on our sweat glands. My sister, her lover and I opted to spend the afternoon in front of the fridge, cleaning. The door was removed, the shelves too. It was purged, pummelled and pollished. Our dillegance belied our brains but the endproduct was so sweet. Independence from smell, scum and stains left by apple pies gone by.
Today, in Los Angeles, there is one more sparkling fridge. This fridge is free (to be admired) of scum and stain-free. It's contents rejuvinated and organized. Remember that traditions are our footprints in the sand that we leave so the following people can samba like they're at a Fred Astaire Dance Studio.