Pink.

In the pink: meaning to be of good health/demeanor.

Pink's: one of my fave hot dog venues

Pink: rock's unabashed angst princess

pink: the best anti car theft deterrent on the market.

It has been deduced that cars painted a bright shade are the least likely to be stolen. This explains the enormous success of the Mary Kay Cosmetic Commandos. That bright shade on your lips is directly related to the bright shade of the Grand Am parked adjacent your co-op. How funny is that?

The gay pirate is a little rosette for the post.

National Hot Dog Day!

It's no secret I'm a fan of wieners. Big fan. Big wieners. To me they say, 'summer' and 'americana'. Remember the old slogan, baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet (even though that sounds french) The Hot dog industry has named July as National Hot Dog month and July 23nd as National Hot Dog Day. I also adore obscure holidays; International Talk like a Pirate Day, Melonball Thursday and am so happy to have found my new fave. The Dog Days of Summer, indeed.

The month begins with the Annual Coney Island Hot Dog Eating contest brought to you by Nathans Famous. My dear friend Joey Chestnut pulled another victory out of his solo cup by eating an astounding 54 HDB's in ten minutes. (hot dog and buns eaten) I know this because, I was there. Well, not physically, but spiritually. I was at friends holiday (July 4th) BBQ in Panorama City getting ready to have my third dog of the day. I was chatting up a very nice lady with tons of BoSox paraphernalia adorning her. I assumed my new besty was gay as she was checking her iPhone for sports feed. Straight, not narrow. She stumbled onto the results of this years competition and I implored her to give me more. When hearing of Kobayashi being arrested at the event I swooned. Kobabyashi is Chestnuts #1 competitor. Long and the short of it (pun intended) is K wasn't registered with the Federation that governs the sport and rushed the stage. High Drama among buns and lemonade. Arrested, hanging on to a rail like a child. Swoon.

See, I have an affinity for this event rising. I look forward to the Fourth Of July just for this very contest. Independence is nice, but wieners don't care who you marry. I remember my first seeing the televised event on ESPN when I was at work one night. My colleagues amazed I could actually be silenced by something on ESPN for that long a time. I was mesmerized by the depravity of my favortie activity and bastardizing it as a competition. I love to eat. I live to eat. I workout like a demon so I can eat more. Sometimes I awaken in the night to eat if I know that there's something special calling to me. Like a mermaid the sushi sings, Pavaroti draws me to the container of pasta leaving past roommates sighing knowing their leftovers when put into the fridge, "will never see the light of day." It's a sport governed by it's own Federation with by laws and dues. I cringe/cheer every time I get to hear one of the competitors resume. You don't know someone until you know how many crab cakes someone can put down. Or pounds of pasta. Or oysters. Would I want to have them for dinner? Probably not. Would I watch them on TV with the earnest love of a six-year old? Abso-freaking-lutely. Competitive Eating? Get out of here....

So get out there and grab yourselves a sausage with relish and succour. In La La Land, there are plenty of choices from Dodger Dogs to my personal fave Pinks. I encourage you to get out there and try it, it's a wonderful holiday and I think you'll enjoy it. National Hot Dog Day, not for the weak of heart, and a sport in some towns. If you are what you eat.....I am a hot dog.

The Sheena Metal Experience Redux

Hello sweet monkeys of fun, denizens of silly how are we today??? I'm currently entertaining my dear Suzie Q on the Left Coast here and showing her the highs and lows of fun in LA. Yesterday we did a taping of the Chelsea Lately show on E! It's a hyper-ballic slam of current events and tabloid titillation. Yesterday she touched on Gisele, John Mayer and Vince, the 'ShamWow" guy. There was some funny material and decent improv. She's a riot, if not a little rough around the edges. Her roundtable featured dear sweet Diablo Cody of 'Juno' fame and her special guest was Camille Guaty from 'Cupid' a strange show with an uncertain future. The crowd warmer was an amazingly hyper fella who scared you all into clapping, stomping and cheering. Chelsea was nice enough to sign some autographs. I didn't have a copy of her book was hoping to get her to sign a pack of Marlboro Lights. Oh well.

Today we're off to have bfast at the Fountain Coffee Shoppe at the Beverly Hills Hotel and then a hot dog at Pinks. Peaks and Valleys my friends, peaks and valleys. And a little shop in between.

What could round out her experience but a trip to The Sheena Metal Experience broadcast on LA Talk Radio!!!! Suzie and I will be in the studio, me as a guest, S as a patient observer. We had a fantastic show on ST Pat's, why not give us a listen 5-7pm today PST and get yourself Experienced! Listen here.

Melonball Thursday approaches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Birthday Week.

I'm at odds at the end of the year, not only because I think back on what the year brought me, but the holidaze are compounded with my birthday. I'm an attention whore, with Attention Deficit Disorder (anagram= awadd). There's just so much rushing around to secure holiday bliss that we all get swept away with it. I sometimes fall victim to that and kinda skip over my natal anniversary. I'm at odds with the rushing towards the New Year. Quite literally I'm at odds on my birthday, it is the seventeenth which is an odd number. Odd and yet my lucky number. A yogi once told me that the numerology of birth dates can tell how long a person has been "around" 1 + 7 = 8 and eight means I've been here awhile. That makes total sense to me.

And sense is what it's all about today. Stimulating all the senses was the agenda. Birthday week begins today and I decide to treat myself to a proper meal on a Sunday. I went to Pink's for a beautiful hot dog. Pink's is an LA institution and one of the first places I'd dined at when first moving here. I had me the Ozzy Osbourne which was a hot dog stuffed in to the cavity of a headless bat. Kidding. It's a spicy hot dog with onions and tomatoes, nacho and American cheeses and I had them jazz it up with jalapenos. Round out this little bounty with chili fries and a strawberry soda and I was in heaven. Granted I didn't smell to pleasant, but that wouldn't stop me from trolling over to BevHills.

My sojourn down Wilshire found the Christmas lights up. My truck had the holiday tunes playing, my eyes and ears were lulled into pleasantville. In front of the Beverly Wilshire Hotel they were shooting what seemed to be a scene from the "Sex And The City" movie as Kim Catrall was tromping down the sidewalk with big shopping bags, and tons of fans gathered near to watch. I'm not sure what sense this activated. I was tempted to touch her, but thought the better of it. See J, all those security guards yelling at me in the museums finally taught me something. I arrived at Needless Markups and found my way to the fragrance counter. I would have the new Tom Ford scent and be pleased in the birthday way. Happy Birthday to me from Uncle Jimmy. The counter attendant had the most amazing bottom it was a privilege to view it. All of the fragrances in the collection are insanely good. I just wanted to leave my nose there to live, but he said I couldn't. All ass and no humor is not going to do the boy well. The Clean scent was amazing but not what I was going for. The Extreme is like High Karate only good. Maybe I offended counter boy with my onion and garlic breath, but I smell amazing as I type this. I'm wearing the collar of my shirt up above my nose like I'm some sort of blogging bandit. The photo is of Mr Ford cavorting his fifty year old towel snapping self with twenty something models in a recent ad campaign for "Billionaires Gone Wild".

My new blogging friend Leah has an expression, "I like nice people who smell good." I guess she'll like me half the time. Hee Hee. Happy birthday to us all!!! And to all a good scent.

Weinerrific.

Have you blushed? A little Pink's looks good on you. Go now, to La Brea Blvd., get a cream soda, a Martha Stewart Special and a side of bannana chili peppers. These hot dogs are so good you will happily stand in line no matter the time of day. Chili fries on the side, it's a splurge worth the extra trip to the gym. It doesn't get any more american than this; Baseball, Hot Dogs, Apple Pie and Chevrolet. As american as Tom Cruise. You too will become a slave to the weiner. Y se habla espanol, tambien.